Archive for the ‘General Post’ Category

I forgot.

January 14, 2012

There is a very good reason as to why I havent been posting as much… I havent through of a good excuse yet so I think I’ll just tell you the truth.

1) I’ve been balls deep (sorry for the expression) in graphic design work. This time 2 months ago I did no freelance work. I have no qualifications in graphic design and had no one who was interested in my work. Now, it’s a different story. I get an email/phone call every day for paid work in graphic design and I’m slowly building an awesome portfolio.

2) I bought Assassins Creed Brotherhood for the PS3 and have been owning. Seriously, I’ve got a gold on each of the Virtual Training sections.

3) University. Oh yes, education. That one is always consuming around 60% of my time and I’ve got a pitch to do next week for Channel M.

4) I’ve been playing too much Pokemon on my DS.

Anyhow. I’ve been feeling sorry for myself because I’ve not posted on here so I cheered myself up by changing my picture and changing the header at the top of the blog. Let me know what you think.

Lack In Posts

January 14, 2012

Sorry for my lack in posts. Been very busy with designing, pitching and playing my 3DS. Anyway, I’m on here now, going to give my page a quick vamp up and get some form of posts ready

Tampax: The New Vodka Shot

January 5, 2012

Brace yourself for horror, because this is going to make your vagina hurt by just thinking about it.
There is a new trend that is literally gushing over the nation’s youth (Not sure if the pun was intended): The vodka tampon. I really thought that it couldn’t get any worse but then I came across this and really got lost. Here is what Bliss Tree had to say about this:

“Probably one of the best dumb ways that college students get drunk, the vodka-soaked tampon sounds like a perfect urban myth…except that it’s true. And it’s not just girls that use it. Which means both men and women are willing to insert alcohol into improper orifices to get drunk without drinking. Unfortunately, because the liquor is absorbed through the bloodstream (and not the stomach, which comes with safeguard like vomiting to keep you from having too much), the risk of alcohol poisoning is much, much higher.”

I was just thinking, most teenagers go out, get drunk and have sex right? So what happens if this is how they got drunk? That poor boys penis is going to burn like a bitch and then smell like a hospital for the next 30+ hours.

Seriously, how is something like this even trending?

New Year: New Start?

January 4, 2012

Everyone on Twitter and Facebook have had one thing in common over the past week: “2012, new year, new me”.

This has been a common annoyance for quite a lot of people, mainly my older friends and by older, I mean mentally. The ones who don’t bull s**t and don’t whine about anything. Anyway, what is the big deal with every year the same handful of people saying they’re going to change and be a different person? We all know who they are, we all have them on our feeds and we all know what the outcome will be. Give it a month and I put money on the table that they either A) Start whoring about again, B) End up messing up the relationship they fought oh so hard to get back (you know, the one that you’ve heard them moan about so much over the past 2 months) or C) going back on ALL their resolutions and getting back into their bad habit’s or being shallow.

Everyone who’s doing this should take a big step back and have a long hard think about what they are telling the world online. I don’t think half of them realise this but the decent half of the world are laughing their virtual asses off behind their screens at all these promises of change and then going back to their old selves.

Take baby steps people, make simple resolutions which aren’t just going to help you, but maybe help others around you and make them feel better and if so, please keep them. You’re just providing those who have blogs material to post on… and of course Failbook. They love that stuff.

Happy New Year

January 1, 2012

Happy New Year and well done to all of you who 1) are still awake at this time, 2) able to read this amongst the amount of alcohol you have drunk and 3) have survived this long. 

As I have read on many blogs on WordPress and statuses on Facebook and tweets on Twitter, 2011 has been quite a sucky year. I feel like the whole year I’ve been going into the fridge and taking a glass of milk only to find after the first… 2-3 glasses that the milk is actually off. So far I’d like to announce that I have already got to a good start as I’m actually getting a lot more clients for graphic design, which brings my onto my next point: You peeps should totally click that like button on my page! I know many of you may not have seen my work but clicking that button lets me know you care about my blog at least. You doing this will bring a tear to my eye, and make it look good for other clients as well as making me look popular amongst you internet people

Anyway, thank you for taking the time to read, I hope you have a good new years day, and not much of a hang over.

2011: What To Remember

December 31, 2011

I have a strong feeling this is going to be a pretty damn long post, so I’ll keep the talking to a minimum and get straight to everything that was good/bad throughout 2011.

I’m sure you all know this little sweet. Osama bin Laden, the man who has been on many peoples hit list and been searched for for near enough a decade was found and killed. One of the crown pieces to 2011.

Protests and riots were something that have have stuck out a lot over the past year. I live in Manchester in the United Kingdom so the ones in the UK were visible from outside my window… actually I don’t mean literally out my window but I was out in the city centre  when it all kicked off. I think the scariest thing I saw/heard while in the riots was a guy on the top of a car wearing a hoodie shouting “lets take back the city!”. Of course this wasn’t going to happen but still, that’s not something I want to experience again.

Earthquake/Tsunami in Tokyo on the 11th of March. Ahh yes, another step closer to 2012, but that’s a different post. There have been a lot of disasters like this. If you would like to read more on this event I found a decent article here

Obama releases his birth certificate on the 27th of April. Look, I dont follow politics and I know I’m not one to question the way a country runs and its rules, but why do you need proof that someone was born in the country to run the country? Surely you want the country to run smoothly and for it to be a good place for everyone? Someone from another country can do this you know? They dont need to have an American flag behind them waving patriotically.

 

The Royal Wedding on the 29th of April. I remember before this happening I wasn’t really interested in it, nor was I interested in weddings, but then I woke up earlier for some reason that morning and my room mate was watching it with this emotional look on his face (this is a action gamer for xbox) so I sat and watched it with him and I honestly thought it was the cutest wedding ever. By ever I mean its the only one I have seen haha other than a generic film one.

Pokemon: Try & Fill Your Pokedex Now.

December 30, 2011

Believe it or not, the image above is all the Pokemon from the first games (Pokemon Red, Blue & Yellow). I saw this and thought “That cannot be right” and actually counted them as I remember there being 150/151 including Mew and MewTwo. I remember with the card game I knew all the Pokemon. All being 150 of them. For my 21st birthday my mother’s side of the family got my a Nintendo 3DS so I thought I would go and get myself Pokemon. Before getting the game I thought I’d have a look at how Pokemon has been doing because a lot of games have been out since I last played (Pokemon Crystal). There are now 646 and they are releasing a further 200 next year for a new game they’re releasing for the 3DS.

I thought trying to catch 150 was hard!

Cannibal Stunt

December 29, 2011

This has got to be by far the sickest thing I have seen on television. By seen, I dont mean I have watched it, but fact that it was recorded and meant for television is sickly. Instead of re-writing what is already on the Sky News website, I’ll just quote what they said and add my part on the end.

Two Dutch presenters are expected to provoke outrage with a macabre television stunt in which they eat each other’s flesh in front of a studio audience.

Dennis Storm and Valerio Zeno both underwent surgery to have a small piece of muscle tissue removed for the grim stunt.
Mr Zeno had flesh taken from his abdomen, while Mr Storm is understood to have had buttock muscle tissue cut out.
A chef then fried the flesh and the pair ate it in front of the audience.
The stunt features on the BNN television show Proefkonijnen – which means Guinea Pigs.
The pair try to answer “stupid questions” by taking on unusual challenges.
The footage does not actually show the moment they eat the flesh but it does show it being cooked.
They have so far refused to say how the snack, which they ate without any salt or pepper, actually tasted but admitted there was “nothing really that special” about it.
Mr Storm said he did not regret his decision but added: “It is weird to look into the eyes of a friend when you are chewing on his belly.”
They insisted their stunt was entirely legal in The Netherlands as both had entered into the pact voluntarily.
A lawyer advised the show’s producers that while cannibalism is not itself against the law, the presenters or the surgeon who operated on them could face legal difficulties.
Mr Storm and Mr Zeno said there was no health risk involved as long as their flesh was properly cooked.

[Original post]

I think that’s very wrong. Yes I know its just meat. We are just flesh and bone like the cows, pigs, chicken etc but isn’t this taking it a bit too far? I think its a bit of a stunt just to get their names into the papers. It may be the wrong way about it, but still… it worked.

The “F” Word

December 28, 2011

You’ll have to excuse the terrible illustration I’ve chosen to use for this post. I literally just put “swearing” into Google and the result was this.

Swearing. We’ve all done it, and we still do it. I remember when I was in primary school (5-10 years old) when someone swore we would do the whole bite the lower lip thing and say “Ohh you swore, that’s bad”. Now look us all. Most of us swear on a daily basis and to be fair I think its become a part of our language. Yes there are some words that are REALLY bad to use, but the normal ones like “fuck”… it can mean a lot of things.

The main reason I wanted to make a post about this was something that happened to me and a friend today. I went into town to pick up a HDMI cable for my mother. While in town I went into one of the shops I thought would sell one and while looking at the various cables with my friend we said in conversation “fuck sake” (I know when written it doesn’t really make sense but we normally say it when we realise something stupid has happened). Anyway, after saying this there was a man (obviously a father) who was with his daughter (which looked about 15-16 years old). He looked at me and my friend, looked at his daughter and said to us “Oi, watch your language”. Now, I can understand if this was a toddler because them buggers repeat everything they hear, but here in Manchester and many other cities in the UK there are bigger problems to worry about with the youths than swearing. Does he think his daughter is a little princess? I don’t want to sound like a prat, but if I was the father, I’d be more concerned about how many people she’s sleeping with at the same time than the words she’s hearing from two guys looking at cables.

I don’t swear when there are little kids around. If on the off-chance I slip up, I’d like to think I’m pretty damn good at covering it up, but if there is someone who is of age to understand right and wrong, then I will use what words I think fit best. I know that some people will disagree but c’mon, in this day and age, kids are doing drugs, having sex with a lot of people, and drinking until they pass out.

Douchebag: For Girls

December 28, 2011

Whatup,

I’ve been talking to a few of my friends recently (these few being female) and they have over the past 6 months been telling me about how terrible some of their dates have gone and told me why they were bad. I was thinking of a generic way that people could put someone into a category when meeting new people so that it easier to tell someone what they’re like if they are a “douchebag”

Douchebag A

The first of the 2 douchebags is high on pride. If they hit 3 or more of these points then they fall into this category.

  • Talking about their own work
  • When you talk, the conversation lasts less than 20% the time their chosen subject would last
  • Obsessive checking of their own looks
  • Not complimenting you on how you look, or even noticing how you look
  • (If you had access to their online profile) More than 90% of their pictures are taken by themselves for themselves and not “on location” (parties, events, outings) shots

What’s that? You think you have met him before? Well its a fact that the class A douche bag is actually known to show at less than 30% of dates, so you don’t have to worry and if you have passed him before, you know how to look out for them in the future.

Douchebag B

Ahh douchebag B. This is one of the ones I tend to hate hearing about. They are depressed/negative about a lot of stuff and tend to have a bad baggage. This one is the swing opposite of A. If you went on a terrible date and they struck out on 3 of these, then they fall into this category.

  • Any subject you talk about is followed by a negative outcome.
  • Always looking at a downward angle avoiding eye contact or not making an attempt for it.
  • Generally boring (to the point where when they say something you do the forced laugh you’ve been practising).
  • Not expanding on conversations when needed as it’s a “hint” to dig deeper and get to know them more I.E. Person 1: “I’m in a band” Person 2: Ohh really? What kind of band?”
  • Generally irritating tone of voice.

Unfortunately everyone ends up coming across the 2 douchebags but once you have bumped into them both you know how to avoid meeting the categories again.

I’ll be accepting high fives via email, ratings & in the comments below.